Musings at Union After the Leaf vs Chicago

Why do me take their girlfriends to hockey games? Why not take their
guy friends? Granted. Many women love hockey– especially in hockey-
crazy Toronto. Most don't. Why do so many men insist on boring their
dates? Besides. It isn't a movie theatre; you can't makeout in the
dark. Stadium food will give you gas. The beer is too expensive to
get sloshed: There will be no drunken sex afterwards.
With the more virile men on the ice, going to a hockey game just
serves as a reminder to her what a fat, beer-gutted slob you are.
Ultimately, hockey is fun but it ain't romantic. When was the last
time you hear a woman gush about the mindblowing date she had pre-
drinking at the Loose Moose?

If your better-half bought two tickets to the Leafs, great! You got
yourself a keeper. Just offer to buy them off her and make it up to
her with whatever turns her crank. Go with a buddy — somebody who
might actually have a good time.

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